Marriage Helps #6
As he exhorts new couples at their weddings to embrace the gospel and to engage in constructive communication and conflict resolution, he now concludes his exhortation to enjoy one another with specific words of counsel.
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge (Hebrews 13:4).
Nothing must be allowed to defile the marriage bed, to profane or foul up the covenanted oneness of marriage that God has made holy. To hold it honor and to protect it from defilement, couples must apply marriage maintenance.
1. Maintain “visible sexual devotion” to one another, so that all can see.
2. Maintain strict propriety in relationships with members of the opposite sex:
No private meetings, no fraternizing flirtations. Involve your spouse with any friendship you have with a member of the opposite sex. It is nearly impossible to have a purely platonic relationship with someone of the opposite sex close to your own age.
3. Maintain a watch over your heart, guarding your heart, your eyes, your thoughts against any defiling influences.
Do not play games seeking stimulation from sources other than your spouse. Long before the Internet, Richard Baxter warned, “When you are looking on the cup, or gazing on alluring beauty, or wantonly dallying and pleasing your senses with things unsafe, you little know how far beyond your intentions you may be drawn, and deep the wound may prove, how great the smart, or how long and difficult the cure.” Avoid tempting situations, tempting sights, tempting entertainments, tempting involvements. Remember your weakness. All that a sinner requires in order to fall into sin is an opportunity; so do not, by your careless recklessness, give yourselves extra and unnecessary opportunities. If righteous David fell, then so can you.
4. Maintain pure attachments.
Repent of all game-playing, lust-teasing tactics or practices. Break off any tempting relationships. Turn off or throw away any lust-provoking trash. Seek Christ for His pardon and for His power to enable you to maintain pure attachments.
Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flows the springs of life (Proverbs 4:23).
